I hold my heart in the same places
His belt strikes the narrow space between my voice and disappearing
He assures me, serious, (not yet)
Smash them under
Get caught
Control yourself
You are shaking
Are they angry feelings?

I wonder how I say nothing
I press the air out of my chest till I mumble it’s ok, don’t worry
They pressure, finger, clarify in this space that it isn’t
Why do you look so badly
It’s so fucked up here
On any given day
You are hurt
Are they sad feelings?

I use the cool concrete to firm my resolve
Stoke the wet center of my anxiety
They push their upper body and say, voice disappearing
Can you trust yourself
Come in
I want to
You are hiding
Are they fear feelings?

You want to hurt me while I’m quiet
I know what I can muster is wrong in the spaces between what is/n’t
They tell me I’m ok with that (for the future)
I’m trying with you
I start you to keep pushing
Pooling brightness
You are softening
Are they joy feelings?